Naturally. Period.
So I've been M.I.A for a while. Welp, I'm back and as and-then-some as ever.
In my time off, I participated in The Vagina Monologues. That's right. Raw. Hardcore. Feminism on a stick. I can't really tell you why I got involved. In reality, I'm a bit of a male-chauvinist. I can't stand to be around women. All of those stereotypes: true. The bitching. The moaning. The primping. The low self-worth. The jealousy. The manipulating. The conniving. The smells. The colours. All of it:true.
I guess it's a bit off that my best friend is a bit of a Feminist Catalyst herself... but if truth be told, she's got to be the most manly womyn I know. I think that's why I get along...and let myself participate in the neo-feminist-movement. But all that aside: The Vagina Monologues.
I was in it. That's right. IN in. I got to talk about vagina's; my vagina. SEX! And the correlation of vagina's and medical instruments infront of a crowd. A crowd including my family, friends, and co-workers. On a side note: I think my Dad single-handedly purchased about 3 dozen organic fair-trade chocolate vagina's.
I guess I just wanted do something cool this year. And it was pretty neat. An experience to say the least.
I certainly learnt alot.
For example: I learnt that I can not, and will not, ever participate in an activity consisting of 50+ women, in one spot, at one time, ever again. Seriously. That many women at once, without even one man thrown into the mix, means all kinds of crazy. That's not to say I could handle that many of the opposite sex at one time either, Good Lord - no.
But 50 women, from all walks of life = Amazonian Temporal Doom.
Another thing I learnt is that with that many women, you are all entitled to eachother's opinions. Let me just say that the "reply all" button should be destroyed.
The scariest thing of this entire experience is that I'm pretty sure that out in the City of Ottawa, there's gotta be about 75 women who are all right now sharing a raging menstrual cycle.
For real. Nothing says womanhood like blood. Period.
Before I go too far, let me just rewind back to the stereotypes. Before y'all get your Lady Lumps in a twist, know that I make this statement on the basis that I am also a woman, and therefore, the same rules apply.
As a woman, there's alot of pressure to not be like"other women". Try not to be mesmerized by pretty things. Try not to give a shit about your appearance or weight. Try not to be whiny and bitchy, or high-strung or moody. Try to be a badass and tough. To walk around like nothing bothers you. But truth be told, it's all a crock of shit.
Forget the stereotypes behind it, biologically speaking, women are designed to be all of those things. It's called "hormones", people! Get use to it!
So yes, back to periods.
They suck. And what sucks the most is that people get all uppity when a woman's on her rag. Like "Woah-ho. You better watch yo'self. It's her time of the month." And so people pussy-foot around your pussy like you're a time bomb waiting to go off. Like in that one week of cycling, you've actually turned into a werewolf-vampire-banshee and will decapitate anyone that looks at you the wrong way.
Maybe it's because it's arts and crafts week at Panty Camp that this kind of attitude rubs me the wrong way, or maybe it's because everybody takes a period for granted. No, seriously! Think about it. Try finding a man that could deal with a bloody cooter for a week. Without periods, there'd be no babies, and therefore no men!
Not that a period is an excuse to be a bitch, but then again, it's in our nature.
So remember women: it's shitty, but that ragasaurus is all yours! So take it with a grain of salt, and milk it for all it's worth. Let your true colours out.
And remember:
You're only human.
In my time off, I participated in The Vagina Monologues. That's right. Raw. Hardcore. Feminism on a stick. I can't really tell you why I got involved. In reality, I'm a bit of a male-chauvinist. I can't stand to be around women. All of those stereotypes: true. The bitching. The moaning. The primping. The low self-worth. The jealousy. The manipulating. The conniving. The smells. The colours. All of it:true.
I guess it's a bit off that my best friend is a bit of a Feminist Catalyst herself... but if truth be told, she's got to be the most manly womyn I know. I think that's why I get along...and let myself participate in the neo-feminist-movement. But all that aside: The Vagina Monologues.
I was in it. That's right. IN in. I got to talk about vagina's; my vagina. SEX! And the correlation of vagina's and medical instruments infront of a crowd. A crowd including my family, friends, and co-workers. On a side note: I think my Dad single-handedly purchased about 3 dozen organic fair-trade chocolate vagina's.
I guess I just wanted do something cool this year. And it was pretty neat. An experience to say the least.
I certainly learnt alot.
For example: I learnt that I can not, and will not, ever participate in an activity consisting of 50+ women, in one spot, at one time, ever again. Seriously. That many women at once, without even one man thrown into the mix, means all kinds of crazy. That's not to say I could handle that many of the opposite sex at one time either, Good Lord - no.
But 50 women, from all walks of life = Amazonian Temporal Doom.
Another thing I learnt is that with that many women, you are all entitled to eachother's opinions. Let me just say that the "reply all" button should be destroyed.
The scariest thing of this entire experience is that I'm pretty sure that out in the City of Ottawa, there's gotta be about 75 women who are all right now sharing a raging menstrual cycle.
For real. Nothing says womanhood like blood. Period.
Before I go too far, let me just rewind back to the stereotypes. Before y'all get your Lady Lumps in a twist, know that I make this statement on the basis that I am also a woman, and therefore, the same rules apply.
As a woman, there's alot of pressure to not be like"other women". Try not to be mesmerized by pretty things. Try not to give a shit about your appearance or weight. Try not to be whiny and bitchy, or high-strung or moody. Try to be a badass and tough. To walk around like nothing bothers you. But truth be told, it's all a crock of shit.
Forget the stereotypes behind it, biologically speaking, women are designed to be all of those things. It's called "hormones", people! Get use to it!
So yes, back to periods.
They suck. And what sucks the most is that people get all uppity when a woman's on her rag. Like "Woah-ho. You better watch yo'self. It's her time of the month." And so people pussy-foot around your pussy like you're a time bomb waiting to go off. Like in that one week of cycling, you've actually turned into a werewolf-vampire-banshee and will decapitate anyone that looks at you the wrong way.
Maybe it's because it's arts and crafts week at Panty Camp that this kind of attitude rubs me the wrong way, or maybe it's because everybody takes a period for granted. No, seriously! Think about it. Try finding a man that could deal with a bloody cooter for a week. Without periods, there'd be no babies, and therefore no men!
Not that a period is an excuse to be a bitch, but then again, it's in our nature.
So remember women: it's shitty, but that ragasaurus is all yours! So take it with a grain of salt, and milk it for all it's worth. Let your true colours out.
And remember:
You're only human.
Comments
But I'm gonna go and be a Debbie Downer and say that maybe it wasn't 50 womyn in one space that was the problem but the fact that it was 50 self-righteous feminists? The job of dismantling patriarchy/sexism ain't easy sis and sometimes, it causes people to go a little haywire.
Nonetheless, don't do selling us ladyfolk out for the all righteous cock. 50 men attempting to get along aren't pretty either, I can guarantee you of that.
But nonetheless, this feminazi loves you mucho nonetheless.
as one of those women in the city 'suffering' from her time, I have to say, I'm always glad to get Aunt Flo.
I bitch a couple of days cause I walk funny and I can't wear light colour pants in fear but hey. this shit use to be worshipped, women were allowed to seclude themselves from men, sit around and stuff their faces for a week every month. GODS YES PLEASE!!! I think that would be fun, don't you?
and I have to ask, who bitched about the red river that sent you off?