In the Death Cab.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

It is time once again to play: Break Down that Song!

This week, we will be taking at look at Death Cab for Cutie's single, I Will Possess your Heart.

Here we go:


How I wish you could see the potential, the potential of you and me
It's like a book elegantly bound, but in a language that you can't read - just yet
You gotta spend some time--love, you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find--love, I will possess your heart (x2)

Hrm, so apparently this song is about a girl who doesn't like you "that way", but maybe given the chance she could warm up to you? Well, that's not so bad, but uh, don't force it, okay Buddy? Chicks don't like that.

There are days when outside your window, I see my reflection as I slowly pass
And I long for this mirrored perspective, when we'll be lovers, lovers at last
You gotta spend some time--love, you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find--love, I will possess your heart(x2)

Woah, okay now, Dude: this Peeping Tom business has got to stop. See, here I was thinking that you're the friend that is in love with his friend, but Jesus - Looking through that window ain't right. And I mean, what the caak? You just want her for the poonani, dont'cha? Duuude, common'! Cut the "lovers at last" crap. The'fuck - go buy her dinner first, sheesh!

I will possess your heart (x2)

See, I don't even need to spell this one out. But I will anyways. P-O-S-S-E-S-I-V-E! Look Oblivious Lady, you better cut this fucker loose before you look him in the eye at some point and he instantly thinks your the She-Ra to his He-Man...as incestual as that would be, but lets face it: This man is all shades of crazy.

You reject my advances and desperate pleas
I won't let you, let me down so easily, so easily

WOAH! WOAH! WOAH NOW! Lady, get yo'self some mutha'fucking MASE! Fucker's gonna RAPE YO'ASS! NO MEANS NO, ASSHOLE! NO! MEANS! NO!

You gotta spend some time--love, you gotta spend some time with me
And I know that you'll find--love, I will possess your heart (x3)

I will possess your heart (x2)

...I, don't even know what to say. To get a better perspective, I decided to go ahead and watch the Official Video for this song.

It opens with some kind of weird, Lotion-on-its-skin backdrop, that quickly turns into some creepy, tuqued Sex Offender Band Mate, that seirously looks like Michael York, walking through this Plastic Wraped warehouse of sorts. You know, Law and Order SVU style.
Then we see a girl, just walking around, taking buses, subways, shit like that. But she's always looking behind her like someone's watching her. She's just walking alone, in a Big Chinese City that turns into Sweden or Greenland, that turns into the Lebanese consolate, that turns into India, and so forth... okay, bitch is Globe Trotting... Alone... Without any sort of company. DON'T YOU KNOW YOU HAVE A STALKER?! Jesus. Pretty American girls get kidnapped and sold into sexual slavery EVERY DAY!
It's about 4:40mins in before other tuqued offender band mate starts singing.

Okay, so it's beginning to become clear to me that wherever this band is jamming, it is quite cold. Hence the tuques, oh, and freezer burnt ceilings... OMG! THEY'RE IN A MEATLOCKER!... there's no other explanation... unless that was actually Michael York, and this is actually a bonus feature in Logans Run.

Pfft, this video is completely unrealistic. If they were really that cold, their tuques would be covering their ears.

Okay, so for an 8:31 long video, nothing even happened. I feel like I just wasted 10 minutes of my life. 10 because it took the time to fucking review this thing.

Guys, see, I actually like Death Cab. But Jesus-Christ! What the fuck, Ben? This song is completely unkosher. And it's the first single off the new Narrow Stairs album? Couldn't you have eased us into this? No... you had to get people singin' along before they realised that it's actually the inner monologue of the Night Stalker.