The Life and Times of Ren... and then some

It's time once again for BREAK DOWN THAT SONG!! And though it pains me to no end to have to listen to this, Nickelback is just full of little gems like this one. You might remember a break down of one " Something in your mouth " off the same 2008 release from the band. And if you thought that was the only disgusting single off the album, well, you were wrong. I present "S.E.X" by the boys, which not only offers a colourful look at date rape, but also indicative that millionaire and narcissist Chad Kroeger might as well be differently-abled as his reading level rivals that of a six year old. Shall we then? "S.E.X." Apparently Chat Kroeger is still at the learning stage where he spells everything out. G.R.O.S.S. "No" is a dirty word, Never gonna say it first, "No" is just a thought that never crosses my mind. Uh, Chad? "No" means "No", you motherfucker. Maybe in the parking lot, Better bring your friend along, Bett...

Okay, right off the bat - Approx. 17% of Canada's population is children/youth under the age of 15. A survey conducted in 2003 by the Canadian Teachers’ Federation says watching TV is a daily pastime for 75 percent of Canadian children, both boys and girls from Grade 3 to Grade 10.( ... ) Thus, the average child in Canada spends on average 42 hours a week in front of the television or computer.( ... ) That is a huge demographic. A huge demographic of children being subjected to not only the tripe that's on the tube, but gallons and gallons of information that's being processed through their developing brains on a daily basis. Television stations make millions off colourful, musical shows that get kids hooked. And if they promise a jump on a learning curve, parents will eat that shit up with a spoon. Anything to make their kids smarter and give them that 'edge' and parents forget that they're propagating the problem of hours in front of the boob tube. That said, ...

The Yuletide season is upon us. For the better prepared portion of our community, you've finished your x-mas shopping. For the bulk of my readers, you probably haven't even begun. For most people, x-mas shopping involves wracking your brain for -the- gift that will compliment your loved ones. For others, a last minute dash to the dollar store will suffice. Then there are the people that shop for their pets. These are not only the people that buy for their pets, but also give from their pets as well. From: Mittenz Major corporations make millions off of these chumps pet owners by milking them for everything their worth. From holiday themed pet toys, to pictures for your best friends with Santa Claws (heh heh) Today I received an e-flyer from PetSmart about some handy-dandy last minute gift ideas for my pets. I am the disgruntled owner of two disgusting cats. Regardless of the fact that they are ungrateful bastards, I wouldn't buy them presents strictly on the principle t...

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Okay, so what we learnt in Pt.I of Bat Out of Hell, is that Meatloaf, in another valiant effort to secure some booty, is planning a dine and dash as soon as Princess passes out from the sheer AWESOME that is Meatloaf's lovemaking. That said, he's also currently living in what can only be described as the Thunderdome, and is hitting the trail in search of greener pastures. In part II of Bat Out of Hell, we will be examining his journey to this Utopia he is so desperate to reach. You better be asleep at the crack of dawn, because he's outta here ... Bat Out of Hell - Pt.II Meatloaf goes 'James Dean' on a Lost Highway I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram On a silver black phantom bike When the metal is hot and the engine is hungry And we're all about to see the light Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole Everything is stunted and lost And nothing really rocks And nothing really rolls And nothings ever worth the cost Is it just me, or does this e...

So, despite my sick lusting after one Marvin Lee Aday , I can't help but pursue action against the lyrics to Bat Out of Hell . Now, before I go any further, I'd like to state for the record that Bat Out of Hell is my favourite Meatloaf song of all time, but it doesn't mean that the song itself isn't ridiculous. Unfortunately, because the song, in all it's Epic'ness is just under 10 minutes long, I've decided to break the song down into 3 parts. I - Meatloaf and the Thunderdome II - Meatloaf goes James Dean on a Lost Highway III- Meatloaf -IS- the Bat Out of Hell! And without further adieu: Bat Out of Hell by Meatloaf The sirens are screaming and the fires are howling Way down in the valley tonight There's a man in the shadows with a gun in his eye And a blade shining oh so bright There's evil in the air and theres thunder in the sky And a killers on the bloodshot streets And down in the tunnel where the deadly are rising Oh I swear I saw a young boy ...